The protector/persecutor

inside our head

Many of us have a pursuer inside our head.

He was our protector while we were little living in a place or situation that harmed us., took charge of protecting us by making us more invisible, further small, further tolerable, allowing our survival and adaptation to circumstances that as children we could not escape.

took charge, hopeless, to keep safe our spark, our individuality, our vital essence.

It made us less curious, less creative, less risky.

Hoy, already adults, that protector has become ours stalker.

Appears when there are changes in view, when we feel vulnerable, when things move out of place. And it comes to our ears to tell us things like “you are not enough”, “does not deserve the pena”, “it's not going to turn out well”, and in its harshest form “they will abandon you again”, “you are not worthy of love”.

What helped us as children is now the biggest obstacle to feeling full and free.

Sometimes you have to remove many layers of shame, but down there, is still there, maybe sleepy, the one we really are. The one we have come to be.

“Everything from outside tells the individual that he is nothing, while everything inside persuades him that he is everything”
ANONYMOUS (D.T. SUZUKI, LECTURES ON ZEN BUDDHISM, 1957)